New poem: Exile

Posted on 2007-04-27

"Exile"

Do you know
What if feels like

To be tossed from society
As an old rag
Crumpled
Torn
Hurt

Thrown out
By your friends

Left to rot
Left with nothing
Nobody
Pain

What if feels like
To be left
Heartless
Red with hate

What it feels like
Left to die
Fade away
Left alone

Alone
Seems painless
Jagged meaning

Left Alone
With just that weapon

Alone
Cuts deep
Scars

Alone
Can change you
Can end you

Alone
Will kill you
Or them

Alone
Is very dangerous
Frighten power

Alone
And they don't know you
What you are doing

Don't know what you could do
Don't know what you might do
Don't know what you're about to do

Poem - Homework

Posted on 2007-04-26

"Homework"

Yay for Becky finally having the epiphany, the moment of realization about homework and what
You are supposed to do with homework in high school mathematics.

Auto Response from Becky (11:29:20 AM): I give up on that calculus homework
Give up on it.
I salute you for your years worth of learning only to realize, with just one year and a month lying
Ahead of you, that the key is to give up.
Some learn this quickly, some take time.  I fell into the middle classification, and in those sweet,
Innocent high school days I did the work as I needed to.
Which means I didn't.
You have probably set your calculus homework down on your bed, on top of the book, in front
Of either your English or science book.

Auto Response from Becky (11:32:58 AM): I give up on that calculus homework


You will return to your bed with the TV on, probably Gilmore Girls or some other meaningless,
Mindless television program
And here is the kicker
You will sit up, legs crossed, and stare down at your menacing text, your empty paper
Picking up the pencil you will say to yourself, alright there's really not that much today, i'll finish
It soon.
Then, half an hour later, you'll realize you have only accomplished a fifth of it.
And that's when the realization will hit.  without you knowing it any more.
Because you have put that "I give up" thought in your head, it will stay there
It will fester
And it's immovable, undefeatable, unrelenting
It will lull you into a few minutes staring at the tv screen.
Oh, not to watch the show.
To not do the work
Your "conscious" will kick back in eventually. and you'll look back at your book and pick up
Your Pencil from where you've dropped it
But the Thought has drugged you at that point.
You'll look down with a big sigh, and looking at the sheets you wont see numbers, you'll see
Scribbles that your eyes refuse to read.
That they can't read.
And then you'll take a peek back at the "necessary" content of which to work in your syllabus or
Your day planner.
And those number will show up loud and clear
Whether you have two more, twenty more, or two hundred more the numbers will say the same thing
"It's going to be hell for you to finish us and you know it, so drop your writing utensil woman, or
We will give you a hernia"
And you know it's true
At least your mind thinks its true.
The drugs the Thought issued are still in action.
But its not over yet. you do have a chance to save yourself
A strong blink, and shaking of the head will jar the thing clear of your mind
But only temporarily
You have a narrow gap in which to resume your labor
If you do, you can pull yourself back into it. \
If you wait too long, but still make the attempt only to lose again, the drug will set in deeper.
And this way it will hit even harder.
Assuming you didn't even attempt to escape it, or did and failed, don't worry.
The end is obvious and numb
You'll drop your pencil into the book, and quickly shut it without watching.
Eyes on the TV
The drug as set you into the "abort" mode.  you're on autopilot and can't pull the plan back up out
Of this failing dive.
Your eyes glaze over with the TV's radiation penetrating, fueling the drug.
And this is the very last moment
You're mouth will fall open, just a little bitYou'll make a quick jolt with either arm.  I'll bet it will be your left
You wont actually realize it, but you have closed the book
And a another finishing blow, a final Thought drifts in from the back of your mind.
"I'll get back to this in an hour"
That's all you hear.
You lean back now, stretch you legs, and it just "coincidentally" happens that your foot pushes
The book back to the foot of your bed and possibly even off.
The TV remote crawls its way into your hand.
But you don't change the channel for at least a half hour.
The Thought takes typically about that long to actually wear off.
But then when it's gone, "I've got to see the end of this show!"
And then "Ahh that's one of the best episodes/new episodes about to come on"
2 hours later you close the night with a deep yawn following the credits scrolling down your tv
Screen.
You might turn it off, you might not.
But then that's when the guilt sets in
"Oh no, I didn't finish that..."
But the thought has a trump card to play, and it always does
"Ah, I'll deal with it another day" or "ah it's not due tomorrow" or "ah i've got the hang of it just fine"
Whichever subject you are on, this will happen.
And then you'll flick off your light,
Throw, not lay or drop, but throw you books and papers off your bed
The guilt feeling died off instantly when that trumping Thought struck. 
Good night Becky, you'll fall asleep feeling accomplished and guiltless
Regardless to the large sum of work you didn't do, you will sleep well
As if feeling you've finished all, and made that journey completely through the hell we
Mentioned earlier
And now here is a bit of irony.
I bet you've already started your homework.But whether you've read this before or after you've started, the end will come And you know it will
Because I have already wasted several minutes of your time.
And that has drawn you even closer to the unavoidable, insurmountable end of the night.
Go ahead, try and finish everything without thinking of my tale.
It won't be possible.  and you'll want to finish everything just to say it's wrong.
And if you do, I tip my hat to you.  well done
But when you don't
You won't admit it.
Have fun with that next chunk of calculus

My Experimental Poetry Portfolio

Posted on 2007-04-22

For my english class I had to make a creative portfolio, so I made one online!  Check it out!

http://www.geocities.com/o2_webdesign/portfolio/intro.html

sorry but i had a dead link at first...

New Poem - "Secrets"

Posted on 2007-04-19

"Secrets"

Very hard to keep
Luscious little pieces
Of sweet and sour
Life-candies.

Secrets rest
On the tips of the lips
Waiting to be set free.

Unchained to terrorize
The one too innocent not
To keep their thought tied down.

To spread
To grow
Mature into rumor
Maybe grow to legend.

So very hard to keep
Slippery little
Bits of weaponry.

Spreading what you know
But don't really want to share
Puts power in Their hands
A grip on your life.

Careful with what lines you deal
They could be tied
A chain to hold you tight
Blackmail.

If They find this
Black Diamond
This piece of power
They can break you.

Set your life ablaze
Snuff it out
As if a little candle
Held in their hands
Doing their bidding.

Keep what tales you can.
Locked deep inside
A tough outer shell
A layer of
Privacy-protective armor.

Don't play around
Don't juggle too much
Don't fill you mind.

Secrets are dangerous.

I need some opinions

Posted on 2007-04-15

Hey everybody out there.  I need some opinions on my writings.  As many as I can get.  Positive or negative opinions are wonderful.  I've posted several poems up here, and if you have the time please read one of them and perhaps leave a comment!  Much appreciated!

New Poem:

Posted on 2007-04-15

I like this one.  I consider it one of my top 5.  Opinions positive or negative are loved though

 

"Coasting Through"

Dark grey matter
Swish colors
Not seen
Imagined

Rosey reds
Tasty Tropicana oranges
Tantalizing tennis ball yellows
Luscious lime greens
Frosted Flakes box blues
Lovely lilac purples

Flowing through and dripping in
To empty vats

Blobs grow
Roll, tumble, twist, turn, squeeze
Into many forms
Barely related topics

Never-ending consistency
Consistently random

Cough syrup reds
And shining whites
Poor in some thought together
Mixing up
To a brand new baseball

Next comes true-blue
Coating all
Morphing, manipulating
Flattening into
National flag

Then it fades away

In comes flesh
Molded, shaped
To your own being
Weird and cute as you'd like

Pick her up
Start mashing
As clay pottery is made
Finishing a beautiful vase
Coating with total black

The vase falls
Into the sunny seas
It must modify

Crumples up
Stretches out
Grows a firm hull
And a Captain deck
Fully encased
Tipped behind
With a huge propeller
As your vase continues
To sink deep

Submarine
Now continues forwards
Evil in sight
Must launch one
Torpedo set forth
Through the subconscious sea

These thoughts ever vast
Unpredictable
Thinking of everything
And of nothing
A complete lack of control
Of our heads
Grey matter

"Ideas"

Posted on 2007-04-14

Ok here's one about not having poetic ideas.  I like it, but tell me what you all think.

 

"Ideas"

Seem hard to come by
Today just sitting at my desk.

Catch some
As with a fish net
While floating through thoughts
Look good
From above the water level.

When pulled up
As pen put to paper
Some slip through the mind's mesh
Others prove weak.

I scribble on
Trying to pound out
A topic.

Plant a seed,
Water, fertilize
With honest attempts to
Mature a thought,
Develop a message,
Grow pencil tree.

That tree formed within
My mind to help
Yield fruit.

Sweet ideas falling
Down in each pencil.

I've got to grab them
Got to write with them
Before the pencils break
Before the idea fruit dies.

Jotting down
Writing fast
Keeps the thoughts fresh
The tree alive
With more to come from each pencil.

The fruits can ripen
Ideas can warm up
It takes time.

If you let them
One way or another
The ideas bring themselves about.

Sort through
As you go along
Root out what's tasty
Preserve those still sour.

Enjoy the flow of natural thoughts
And fill your paper
With the fruits of you mind.

"Stress Sets In Like"

Posted on 2007-04-13

Here's a new poem that I just wrote.  I don't think its done....but I'd like some help to see how I could improve it.  So tear it appart if you'd like :)  I don't even think it has a proper title....

"Stress sets in like"

Hazy mist of fog floating,
Glimmering, glistering.

Lighthouse behind, shining
Golden streaming

Coat of dreams setting fast
Drifting this way

Taking in one breath last
Fading away from that day

A pungent scent inhaled
Of hopes and wishes

And all is unveiled
 Lighthouse passes

By once more blinded
Looking as all faded to ashes

Beam dies down
Standing on a stack of green

Wearing a crown
In a beautiful scene

As would've wanted it to be
Happily enjoyed

Suddenly this fantasy
Faded

Back was the mysterious
Lighthouse still in a twist

Fog spread delirious
House began to list

Black explosion crack
All sounds and blazed the sky

Streams of blood tracked
Trail of something gone by

Blood felt
Not seen

Perfect dark and hot to melt
Can't tell what had been

Vision clearer ahead
Fear settled in

Floating down a river red
Tasting death and feeling skin

Up and stood
Jumped clear of the after-life

Just over a cliff and could
See earth approach as a blunt knife

Met the dirt and pieced it clean
Hit somewhere splashing

Surrounded, devouring mean
Evil blazes scorching

Drowning in a sea of black
Tears of sorrow, death, guilt swallowing

Chocking spirit
Draining hope

Sinking heart
Caught forever

Shaking now with cry's start
As eyes uncover

Cold beads of fear
Dripping along

Blankets thrown, there or here
Pillow too scattered wrong

Rise up
Balance weak

Pick up a cup
As to sneak

A glass of water
To settle the gut

Breathing deeper
Pattern cut

Drain the glass
Walk slowly to bed

Knowing that dream will pass
Again by lighthouse you will be led

Through fantasy
Glorified

And along anxiety
Horrified

Functions same as reality
Ups and downs, ins and outs

Works the same as humanity
Good and bad without doubts

Free-roll for the Mind

Posted on 2007-04-13

Here comes the most random list of thoughts possible.  I just typed as fast as I could the first words that popped into my mind, looking all around to help the thoughts shoot in.  So don't expect any pattern or intentional meaning to this.  But I hope I can grasp some ideas from it.....

"Free-roll for the Mind"

Cell phones
Numbers
Typing
Microsoft
Baseball
Tennis
Basketball
Marbles
Trading cards
Video games
Television
Dvd
Pringles
Stuffed up nose
Allergies
Temperature
Medicine
Guts
Glory
Fade
Passion
Heart
Compassion
Bloody
Death
Murder
Letters
Mathematics
Hats
Teams
Speakers
Luden's cough drops
Seminole
Nike
Distance runner
Rock
Squirrels
Kings
Sweet
Sweat
Go
Fast
Flow
Slow
Row
Hobo
Marquee
Vitamin B

That's all I'll let roll out right now or this would really be a very long list.  I'm hoping that it will bring me several good ideas, and perhaps you........

Lamictal

Posted on 2007-04-13

Soooo I've learned something.............

If you accidentally forget to take you Lamictal for a couple days, your seizure preventative medication, and follow that with 4 high energy drinks in one hour.....

you have a seizure.

Lesson learned.  The end.

"Time and History"

Posted on 2007-04-13

Ok I just sat down one day and started writing this. Originally I thought it'd be a ver sarcastic, semi-comical generalization of history. That idea totally flipped over and out of my mind. It ended up being what I would call a slightly edgy, crude reference to....well I won't tell you what I take from it. You tell me what YOU take from it! Even I don't understandd everything I've written, but perhaps that's the beauty of it. I can pull what I want from it, and you can do the same. Questions, comments, opinions, and advice would be very appreciated!

"Time and History"

Time is unstoppable
Ever-continuing
Ever-growing
Joyful times
Devastating times
On an untold pattern
Like Anna Nicole's weight.

I Hate the passing of time
Like the KKK
Hated King.

Time can move too slowly sometimes
If you realize
You are waiting
For the end as did
Jews and the holocaust.

I'd pay for a pause
If I could afford it
And dodge a lowly
Time-imprisoned life-style
Like what O.J. escaped
Way to go, Cochran.

Or maybe lie
To father time
My way into
A state of pathological
Immunity
For perpetual freedom
Inspired by Clinton.

Something to
Jar the universal time bombs
But avoid the
Cold war's Death Clock.

It will take
An untold force
Nothing weak
Or pathetic
As France in world wars.

Nothing peaceful
Hippies suck.

Become a thief of time
Whatever it takes
Gather seconds
Beg, borrow, cheat, steal
Like Watergate.
Thanks Nixon.

Time with which
To grip people
To keep their attention
By affecting all Americans
It's too soon for a 9/11 line
But you knew it was coming
The line
Not the planes.

I'll start an addiction
Become a second-hand dealer
I've heard dealers
If you carry the right stuff
Make good money
Crack, heroin
Best of all obsessions for
Time-enhancing "medicine."
Bo-Tox bends ages.

I Must remember
Time is relentless
The juggernaut of all
Invincible.
Cancer, AIDS
Apocalypse.

Time is running out
Classically said
‘THE END IS NEAR'
Encouraging suicide
The Born Again and Goths
Would make easy targets.

Time moves along
Time fades away
Unstoppable
Irreversible
Permanent measurements in history.

We live it
Memory records it
History engraved
Inside the mind.    

A Few Poems

Posted on 2007-04-13

I'm currently in an experimental poetry class, and I've written several, several poems and i will post some of them here.

I'd love to see comment and criticisms and questions about these, because that would help me become a better writer.

Today's World

Twisted, blunt,
Fearless, radical,
Paranoid, cautious,
Grotesquely proper.

 

"Squirrels"

Psychopathic suicidal,
Fluffy fur balls,
Barely able to dodge a car.

Oddly aggressive,
But still paranoid,
I don't understand why they are.

Staring at me blankly now,
Walking across Landis,
Leering at me as I write.

Bold or just stupid?
As bizarre as they are,
Looking as if in a state of plight.

Can't understand it all.
Or maybe I could?

Another out a tree,
Scurried along in front,
Of course staring at me.

I stood, walked towards him,
As he sprinted way,
He stopped just far enough to see mem
But waiting for me to retreat.

Going back to sit,
He approached again,
Slower than before,
A cautious eye on me.

Didn't stand up this time,
Just let him be.
Probably had something important,
Something to do in the tree.

Perhaps a family,
Wife, two little ones,
A little squirrel apartment,
Modest as could be.

Two beds and one bath,
Enough to get by.

A family to feed,
Take care of,
Take risks for.

Endangered for others,
Must be done,
Can't afford safety.

Not bold,
Not stupid.
Courageous.

Well, there.  That's all of them that I feel like posting right now.  I've got several, several more.  Maybe if I get enough reviews and comments, whether good or bad, I will post more!

First post!

Posted on 2007-04-12

For some reason, from time to time I find myself desperately craving a blog.  And then I always, always start one.  So that's why I'm here right now Tongue out    I'm going to post the most random stuff, if I keep up with everything.  Perhaps some college stories from Florida State University.  Yeah, that's right, I go there!

 Mail me if you wanna know anything or have cool ideas.

I'll probably be posting short stories or poems that I write just cause its fun.....

-Robbie

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